I've been single now for exactly 6 months.. Six months ago my divorce was final with a capital F and I couldn't be happier.. but alas this post is not about bashing the ex because he is not worth my time nor energy.. Painful lesson learned, moving forward..
These past six months I haven't been doing much with my life other then eating my emotions, realizing my self worth or lack of :( and thinking about what kind of positive changes I can make in my life.. bottom line is that I'm in a rut, a huge rut. I need a goal, a BIG goal, something to keep me occupied and focused on, something to keep me out of trouble. So I have decided to embark on competing in a fitness competition before my 40th birthday and being that I have 1 year, 6 months and 3 days to accomplish that goal I better get busy.. The working out part.. that's easy peasy, the nutrition part, well that's a different animal that I struggle with on a daily basis.. My first goal is to lose some fat.. not a lot of fat cause I'm not really fat just kind of squishy in areas, then I will work on building some muscle..
I've been attempting this program for the past two years now, always giving up and going to something else after the first month or so..It's not an easy program but the results I've seen are fantastic.. My goal is to complete it even if it takes me more then 12 weeks.. like I said something to keep me occupied and out of my head and to make me feel worthy again.. kind of hard to believe that the divorce that I filed for and wanted adamantly has made me feel unworthy but thats a different post for a different day...
Back and Biceps are whats on tap for todays workout.. after I get done with my second job, cleaning houses on the side.. one of the perks of being single, working two jobs..
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